I was asked this question yesterday and I was quite uncertain as to how I felt about the terminology in that given moment. After some thought, I’m not concerned about how others refer to me. Their words would be a reflection upon them and not me. I do recognize that I have a chronic mental illness which requires ongoing medication and my diagnosis is schizophrenia. I’m also quite aware of the stigma of such terms and that others in my situation have strong preferences such as being called clients at the upscale psychiatric office where I’m seen. Obviously, the hospital refers to us as patients but when in doubt ask the person who is affected. They/I/We are human and like any other would appreciate the opportunity for input in the matter. Plus, we may want the chance to get it out there on the table instead of hiding it from our everyday life.
Category: mental health
Social Isolation
Avoiding others is something that I have to constantly work at because of things like side effects and memories of bad experiences such as hearing voices in the phone and not being able to discern what was real and what was not. It became difficult to have a conversation when so many voices were going off as well as distractions from visions. My thoughts would also become jumbled during conversations due to added anxiety. That is why I need to work my hardest at staying connected to others and put aside the fear of meeting strangers in a new energy healing class, qigong seminar or self-compassion/psychological wellbeing lecture that I’m interested in…and just go with the flow.
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Group Meditation
Prior to needing meditation, I never realized how many opportunities exist if you only look for them. From community college continuing education, to college walk-in silent group sessions, to the mental health non-profit opportunity I took part in today. I’ve found that meditation is necessary with my schizophrenia because it helps to control the restlessness and tremors when I relax and intentionally forces the stress out of mind and body. For me, not only is medication necessary but I don’t know where I’d be without silent group work.
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Overcoming Schizophrenia
Spiritual networking, movement exercises, and peer group work are some of ways that I’m handling my schizophrenia diagnosis. In addition to spirituality and resilience group therapy, and as well as qigong and yoga, I’ve also signed up for the following classes:
The Art of Centering
Beyond Aromatherapy
Nutrition and Cancer
Crystal Singing Bowl Sound Bath
Integrative Wellness
WarmFeet Intervention
Writing from the Body
Soul Journeying and Drum Circle
The nutrition classes aren’t just for me but my family as well. My daughter was diagnosed with MALT lymphoma a few years back and is undergoing immunotherapy maintenance (Rituximab). Centering and Journeying are more spiritual in nature and WarmFeet is because I am pre-diabetic. The sound and aromatherapy is simply peaceful and relaxing while the writing is therapeutic and helps with cognitive setbacks. I’m often socially withdrawn because of my schizophrenia and medication side effects so these classes keep me communicating with others. The others in the groups all experience different illnesses or are caregivers to someone so it helps to know how others cope with unfortunate illness or life’s setbacks.
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Managing Schizophrenia with Atypical Anti-psychotics
Abilify vs. Seroquel: for me it’s a toss up. While Abilify controls hallucinations, delusions, and paranoia, it doesn’t work as well during stressful experiences. Seroquel does work during chaotic times, however, the downside is that I have extremely negative side effects with the Seroquel, such as agitation and anger. I’m not talking rage but more disorderly conduct like getting kicked out of the library because I had a fit when my books on hold were misplaced. The bad side effects from Abilify for me are akathisia (restlessness) and tremors (hands shaking). Quetiapine (Seroquel) also sparked weight gain for me which the aripiprazole (Abilify) does not. All in all, I prefer the Abilify because it doesn’t cause cognitive issues in me the way the Seroquel did. That being said, I keep Seroquel around to subdue myself during the worst of moments. Both drugs side effects bring about social withdrawal because I don’t want outsiders to see the tremors or anger. On the horizon, my psychiatrist says there is Latuda, should things turn downward with my current regimen of Abilify, Gabapentin, Zoloft, and Wellbutrin. He holds out great hope for that one…and it’s nice to know there is always hope.
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Resilience throughout Recovery: A Memoir of My Journey through Mental Illness by Angela Grey
Distraction can be a good thing up until the point of denial. Regarding my delusional disorder, I figured that if I wrote it off as something else (social anxiety, PTSD, or chronic depression) then I’d be more normal. Plus, my denial protected my immediate family (custody of children); but at what cost. My partition delusion and both auditory and visual hallucinations weren’t simply the result of past abuse or cultural idiosyncrasies: misconceptions by my immediate family which delayed the diagnosis for years. However, I appreciate that time I had with some of my hallucinations for they comforted me in ways that I will try to relay. In the end, it was cognition, memory, and confusion problems which led to psychosis that took me down and brought me to the emergency room, where we sat riverside trying to figure out where it all began and what was or wasn’t a cause.
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