Category: anxiety

Journaling to Reduce Anxiety

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Journaling may whisk your worries away. Keeping a journal has many health benefits, and according to research it is a highly effective technique for managing stress and anxiety.

Studies also show that journaling can help boost self-confidence, improve mood, relieve depression and improve focus, further reducing your anxiety. There are no rules to journaling. You can write freely or use journal prompts for anxiety.

Research shows that journaling can help

  • Boost mood
  • Release negative thoughts
  • Reduce stress
  • Reduce chronic worrying
  • Release pent-up feelings
  • Induce better sleep
  • Enhance self-awareness of anxiety
  • Help with depression
  • Increase productivity
  • Boost memory and comprehension
  • Help achieving goals
  • Strengthen self-discipline 

Journal Prompts for Anxiety (as taken from a UMN Center for Spirituality & Healing class group work):

  1. What do you feel most anxious about and why?
  2. What 3 positive things have happened to you today?
  3. What are today’s worries?
  4. What are 3 things that you are most afraid of and the reasons why.
  5. What is your dream job?
  6. Write about 5 occasions in your life when you were truly happy?
  7. Write about what you have learned from a past failure.
  8. What strategies have you used to help you cope with anxiety?
  9. Make a list of situations when you are anxious.
  10. What triggers your anxiety or makes your anxiety worse?
  11. Write a letter to a person that caused you pain explaining that you forgive them.
  12. Write about the 3 lessons you have been given by your anxiety.
  13. Is there a situation or person that you need to let go of? Write your reasons for holding on.
  14. Make a list of all the things that you are grateful for in your life.
  15. Take a moment to imagine your life without anxiety. What would you be doing in this life?
  16. Write down at least 10 things that always make you smile.
  17. What are your greatest qualities?
  18. If you could meet anyone in the world who would that be and why?
  19. If you could travel anywhere, where would that be?
  20. Choose a fear that you would like to overcome and write a list of ways how you could overcome this fear.
  21. Describe your biggest accomplishments.
  22. Make a list of things that you like and don’t like about your body. Next to each item write a reason why.
  23. Write down all the people with whom you have a good relationship with and the reasons why.
  24. Think about people who you have a bad relationship with. Make a list of these people and the reasons why. Also, write next to each person why they are still in your life.
  25. Write down your most re-occurring negative thoughts and the reasons why they keep repeating.
  26. What brings you peace and why?
  27. Make a list of 3 things that you want to change about yourself. Then write action points on how you could accomplish this.
  28. Where do you feel the safest and the reasons why?
  29. Who loves you truly for who you are?
  30. Write about what you look forward to every day and the reasons why.

What is social anxiety?

Social anxiety disorder (social phobia) is a chronic mental health condition in which social interactions cause irrational anxiety and fear. Social anxiety disorder typically begins in the teenage years, though it can sometimes start in younger children or in adults.

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If we consider the statistics, according to the National Institute of Mental Health social anxiety is more common among women than men, and approximately 12.1% of U.S. adults experience a social anxiety disorder at some time in their lives. That means that 12 adults in every hundred, struggle with social anxiety, and these numbers are growing every year.

So how can you tell if you’ve got social anxiety? Some of the symptoms are:

  1. avoiding social situations
  2. cancelling plans abruptly
  3. immense guilt when you cancel plans
  4. needing alcohol to face social situations
  5. feeling like you can’t participate
  6. dreading social situations
  7. dreading being outside your safe space (home)
  8. missing school or work due to anxiety
  9. worrying about perceptions of you
  10. overthinking things to say or do
  11. blushing or reddened face
  12. excessive sweating
  13. fast heartbeat when in social situations
  14. talking to strangers
  15. going on dates
  16. meeting new people
  17. making phone calls
  18. making eye contact
  19. using public restrooms
  20. isolating yourself
  21. dizziness in public
  22. muscle tension or twitches when social
  23. stomach trouble when social
  24. dry mouth or throat

At one time or another I’ve experienced many of these. Why? I believe it’s a combination of genetic and environmental factors at play.

The good news is that social anxiety responds very well to medication management; at least for me it has.

If you experience these symptoms for a prolonged period of time, do yourself a favor and seek therapy. No one should have to suffer when there are treatments available to at least alleviate some of the symptoms.

Anxiety Causes and Things I Had to Do to Lessen It

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Please note that I didn’t write to cure it because for some people there is no cure. Anxiety may be in part genetic. So, what are some other causes: alcohol and drug abuse, chronic pain or injury, stressors or uncertainties, personality, unhealthy eating and little to no exercise, traumatic events, or diabetes, cancer, or other physical medical conditions like thyroid disorder.

So, according to my therapist, what are some things I tried that alleviate anxiety?

  1. Deep breathing
  2. Progressive muscle relaxation or the body scan from head to toe
  3. Taking a walk even around the block to begin
  4. Listening to soothing or upbeat music
  5. Drinking chamomile tea
  6. Practicing yoga or stretching
  7. Journaling
  8. Limiting caffeine & avoiding alcohol and/or nicotine
  9. Exercise such as running or swimming
  10. Get plenty of sleep by aiming for 7-8 hours in a room without electronics, preferably dark (for melatonin) and slightly on the cool side
  11. Meditation by either sitting on a chair, on the floor, or laying down to get the incredible benefits for reducing and managing anxiety
  12. Questioning your worries by asking: Is this thing that I fear likely to happen? How can I be sure? What evidence do I have? If it does happen, how does this affect me? How would someone else view this worry? Is there another possible outcome or explanation? Is this fear solvable? What can I do to solve it at soon as possible?
  13. Immerse yourself in nature by getting daily doses of fresh air and sunshine
  14. Aerobic exercise reduces cortisol levels (stress hormone) and anxious thoughts thereby making you feel happier and calmer.
  15. Give up on perfectionism by setting goals and striving for completion with the time allotted. Then submit and move on. No looking back.
  16. Cut back on sugar, which can cause or contribute to many health issues and chronic diseases, including mental health disorders like making anxiety or depression worse. Remember, sugar quickly releases energy, but it is followed by a sudden crash, which brings on even more sugar craving.
  17. Eat an antianxiety diet such as vegetables and whole grains that give a slow release of energy and are stable on blood sugar, helping to control your sugar cravings.
  18. Avoid foods from conventional farming that use chemicals such as pesticides, fungicides, herbicides, and other toxins that your body needs to eliminate. Visit a farmer’s market.
  19. Avoiding processed foods are loaded with additives, preservatives, colorings, flavorings, and other chemicals that also cause a lot of extra work for your detox organs.
  20. Detoxify your body with techniques that include eating plenty of high fiber foods, i.e., root vegetables and whole grains, Epsom salt baths, quality sleep, sauna sweating, drinking enough water, hot shower for five minutes then immediately followed by a brief cold shower.
  21. Eat a healthy and balanced meal, i.e., that avoids essential nutrient deficiencies with B vitamins, Vitamin A and C, magnesium, zinc, iron and selenium, and omega 3 fatty acids that aid the body and mind in functioning correctly.

Book review: Solitaire by Alice Oseman

HarperTeen, an imprint of HarperCollins Publishers, 2015

This enticing and compelling read is not a quick page-turner but instead delves into depression and how a conformist attitude hurts the victims, perpetrators, even the extremely passive bystanders like the main character, Tori. Individuals who chart their own course (love interest) seeking to change a world deadset on not changing are hurt worst. For Tori, it’s best to view everything as all good and don’t burden anyone which does more harm than good, but Tori isn’t herself as depicted by the previous highly exaggerated letter that’s at odds from who she is now: dulled by lack of not caring.

Mental breakdowns come out of the blue as they do in this book where Tori’s ramblings have no immediate backstory. Tori isn’t judgmental but instead mentally ill. The suicide attempt and self-harm relapse are written well and relatable.

This book doesn’t lend itself to problematic ideas but instead shows a realistic portrayal of mental health issues with the perfect amount of seriousness with a good climax breakdown that is a hopeful but realistic end to this story.

Book review: Finding Audrey by Sophie Kinsella

Delacorte Press, 2015

Fourteen-year-old British teen Audrey is making slow but steady progress dealing with her anxiety disorder, which she developed after a car accident and tremendously difficult bullying. This mysterious altercation(s) with the mean girls at her school has sent her deep into an anxiety spiral so her life has changed dramatically since she has been battling depression and anxiety disorders. She is now always wearing dark sunglasses, unable to leave the house, doesn’t attend school, and has an attack if she talks to anyone besides her family. Audrey records what goes on in her house since she has a very hard time going outside and the drama of her family. Her brother Linus’ friend comes into the picture, and her recovery gains momentum.

This YA romance novel with excellent dialogue was a witty and sassy quick read. It showed us the recovery from mental illness as opposed to the descent into it that many others reveal. Her dysfunctional family provided some comic relief, even though the author kept the mental illness topic gentler and more lightweight than other books on the same subject.

It was a lighthearted, limited angst, ofttimes humorous story about teen life, anxiety, first love, and family love that discussed mental health therapy techniques, but I’d have loved to hear more of the backstory that caused her the issues the book talks about.

Book review: A Quiet Kind of Thunder by Sara Barnard

Simon Pulse, 2018

This heartwarming, challenging novel about a girl, without her best friend, that can’t speak and a boy that can’t hear. Steffi has selective mutism and Rhys is deaf; but then the principal puts them together and Steffi crushes deeply. This novel is full of British Sign Language, which appears similar to ASL, starting with the inside of the cover we have the alphabet and the numbers, then every chapter number has its equivalent in the sign language. Even during the story there are lines that explain how to signs specific words in BSL like “thank you” or “I am sorry”. 

The backstory is full of complex families and relationships. She can express herself at 100% only to people she knows pretty well, and she is comfortable with her family or best friends. Tem, a daughter of refugees, who is the opposite of Steffi, is chatty and able to fill all the silence of Steffi. Tem never judges her best friend and never forces her to talk.

Steffi’s brain can pass from a good thing to a disaster quickly. No matter if she has any reason to think about something terrible, which leads to depression, and sometimes it’s really impossible to get out of it. “Panic attacks are a lot like being drunk in some ways, you lose self-control. You cry for seemingly no reason. You deal with the hangover long into the next day.”

Steffi comes from a loving, supportive family, has access to a good therapist, and has a trusted friend at work where Steffi communicates sometimes. This romantic character portrayal with racial diversity is a quick issue driven read. and is a relatable, perfect depiction of anxiety.

Book review: Highly Illogical Behavior by John Corey Whaley

Dial Books, 2016

Agoraphobic sixteen-year-old Solomon Reed has not left his house in three years due to acute anxiety, crippling panic attacks, and agoraphobia, but Lisa Praytor is determined to change that by beating his illness and saving Solomon from himself—and to write a scholarship-winning essay based on the results, which Solomon knows nothing of the sort. Lisa remembers the day in eighth grade when Solomon stripped to his underwear and got into a fountain as a result of a panic attack. But he isn’t depressed, strange, angry, excessively shy, or any of the other negative qualities characters with mental illnesses receive in literature. Instead, Solomon is a funny and compassionate young man who loves his family and friends

So, with the help of her boyfriend Clark, who Solomon ends up crushing on, Lisa enters Solomon’s world in order to observe him for her essay which will get her to university on scholarship and out of suburban California. Soon, all three teens are far closer than they thought they’d be, and when their facades fall down, their friendships threaten to collapse, as well.  This story shines with how the characters handle the aftermath of such a ludicrous intention as armchair psychology to cure mental illness.

This book provides a human look at mental illness and how we need to treat those who have mental illness as people first. The hilarious, heartwarming, skillfully told coming of age story alternates between Lisa and Solomon’s witty, bantering voices. Solomon’s grandmother who’s his best friend, is portrayed with youthfulness and quirkiness which adds a fresh tone to the novel. It’s a quirky and endearing character portrayal that explores the intricacies of friendship, trust, and identity, in addition to mental health issues.

We must take baby steps.

babe steps

Instead of telling ourselves, “This could never happen for me,” we must ask ourselves, “What can I do to bring this closer to me?”

It doesn’t have to be a huge step. We don’t have to make it happen all at once. But we need to do something — at least one small thing — every day to get closer to the life we want. We need to do one small thing to get closer to being the person we want to be.

To do this, we need to get clear on the end goal.

So, let’s make a list of why we want something, get committed to the end goal, and then get transparent on what small steps are needed to take each day to get closer to it.

  • What do I want?
  • Why do I want it?
  • Why do those reasons matter to me?
  • What is the end goal? How do I want to see myself a year (or more) from now?
  • What can I do today to get closer to that?

Every day that we make a small step is a success! We’re proving to ourselves that we can do it when we want the end result badly enough to commit to it.

And in so doing, we build up our self-confidence. Other people’s limiting opinions on what we’re capable of no longer have any power over us. And neither do the limiting thoughts we used to have.

baby steps

Believing in ourselves doesn’t mean saying, “I’m 100% finished with my self-growth, and I don’t need to change anything or learn anything more.”

When we know the truth about ourselves, we know that we’re born to keep growing, keep learning, and keep contributing.

When we believe in ourselves, we know we’re worth the investments we need to make in our personal growth.

We know we’re smart enough, strong enough, and capable enough to do what is needed to do to become the person we want to be.

It doesn’t mean we’re not enough as we are. Being enough doesn’t mean we have permission to stop growing; it means we have what it takes to keep growing.

Because we do. We need to believe in that, first of all. Then build on it.

And may our courage and unshakable belief in ourselves influence everything else we do today.